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Author: Agul

[Idea] Pride

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Post time 25-2-2008 06:16 PM | Show all posts

Reply #37 Agul's post


<--- silent reader yg 'pemalu' tu..

entah la.. actually macam kurang faham pasal tajuk ni.. so nak mengolah & cari arah tu payah sikit..
pride.. izzit self-respect? ego? self-importance? self-esteem? satisfaction? self-regard? dignity?
xberapa sure - adakah ianya sesuatu yg positif ataupun negatif..?
apa pulak impactnya pada seseorang, individu sekeliling, komuniti, masyarakat, etc..?
pernah dengar my ex-lecturer cakap pasal bab ni dulu, tapi sampai skrg masih kurang faham
(haha~ lambat pickup ke? adehhhhh!)

neway.. ada google2 sikit tadi - kononnya nak lebih memahami la..
jumpa beberapa quote about pride.. so nak share la kot2 leh dapat ilham..

揫color=Black]Pride makes us artificial and humility makes us real

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 Author| Post time 25-2-2008 09:10 PM | Show all posts

Reply #39 my-alja's post and mbhcsf

Those who deserve to get an A, should get an A.


Kalau yang cemerlang dapat C, yang kurang cemerlang pun dapat C, tak ada "distinction" langsung lah...

Tak tercapai objektif penilaian.

Kena ada standard pemberian gred yang spesifik dan berpandukan skema. Takkanla season 1 takde A, season tu takde A, selama2nya takde A.

Ni tak, student yang tahap A++ pun dapat C, semata2 nak puaskan hati lect tu.... Apa citer...
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Post time 25-2-2008 10:48 PM | Show all posts

well...macam nilah

Originally posted by Agul at 25-2-2008 09:10 PM
Those who deserve to get an A, should get an A.


Kalau yang cemerlang dapat C, yang kurang cemerlang pun dapat C, tak ada "distinction" langsung lah...

Tak tercapai objektif penilaian.

...

in courses require clinical skills development nih, well u got  to understand  it's more on the skills, and usually the schema (though the skills are assessed by profs )  will dictate the acquisition of skills as to be err..like acontinuum  tau. so a second year student will acquire so and so level of skill  in clinical history taking ker CTHnya, but a 4th year will be at B+ stage as .dictated by th ecriterion and these skills ahve een studdied by clinician that's  why the schema will actually said usualy a this stage ...a person will acquire certain certain skills but not fully developed in terms of...sebab tu in a year yg truely  obtained B+  tu mmg kitasalut habis , mmg they act / behave like mmg matured giler , the thought process tu.

So in contrast with papers , well that's the easiest part lah.When it's an A it's going to be an A lah. Tapi skills ni lain sikit .Seba nama pun skills.

allright then.
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Post time 25-2-2008 10:51 PM | Show all posts

hmmm....

Originally posted by naden at 25-2-2008 06:16 PM


i am interested to know ur product of synthesis ni.Still synthesising?
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Post time 25-2-2008 11:55 PM | Show all posts
wow...tak berat ker kepale bincang perkara2 camnie...hehe....
sy nak baca pun rasa cam nak gugur rambut.....

memang Epistemology and Thinking betul laaa....

anyway, i have a long way to go  reading here....pastu baru leh komen....
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Post time 26-2-2008 08:37 AM | Show all posts
I'm one of the silent reader ....
What I believe....nothing bad by being prideful....that pride can be very powerful and positive form of our self respect.
Nurturing your pride is one of the healthiest things you can do for yourself, if you nurture the right kind.

Macam yoga class lacture pulak...
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Post time 26-2-2008 11:44 PM | Show all posts
To me pride builds self esteem/worth. You have to feel good about something you have, done or achieved in order to elevate your acknowledgement or respect for your own self. I am not sure why this is regarded as a negative emotion and I shall leave it to dear Agul to elaborate. What I feel is that lack of it or having too much of it may cause problems.

Lack of pride may ultimately result in a lack of self esteem and this can drive a person to self destruct, rebellious behaviour etc. Just like a person who had never received a good upbringing may grow up feeling so deprived that he turn out to be violent or abusive. Having too much pride may sometimes  work against you too.

Taking pride in having problems, issues and challenges in life....?

However, we also subtly take pride in having problems, issues and challenges in life.
We feel special that we have them. We are proud that we can survive. That we can continue on eventhough we have all these problem, having bourne it for so long. Or we may take pride in having problems that is unique.


I wouldn't actually describe it as such......But once I have solved them, I'd feel a pride in that accomplishment

An abused wife may be subtly proud of herself, being abused. Because somewhow, subconciously she feels that it makes her a great person. A noble person of high moral standards and patients. She is better than other because she can stand being abused and still be a good mother and wife (in her mind). She may be proud of her sacrifice.


I beg to differ here....It is the lack of pride and self esteem that led her to allow herself to be abused. Only a MSP would tell her it is a noble thing.

Another person may unknowingly always get into trouble, because he thinks that good people always faces challenge. Things only run smoothly for a bad person. So we see pride here.


This is a matter of perception really....more like a false pride...........who is taking the statistics anyway? So, If I am rich, I must be bad and the poor are good people? No, no, no. It's not that simple.
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 Author| Post time 27-2-2008 12:09 AM | Show all posts
Great track we have here...

Probably will have to write a long post to clarify mater here...

The keyword here is shifty, and hidden.

So many here do I use...
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Post time 27-2-2008 12:24 AM | Show all posts
I'm so lazy and sleepy to read now....
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Post time 27-2-2008 12:28 AM | Show all posts
Proud to have pride? :re:

I think it is important for the self to feel good about itself. For one, you would be able to "place" yourself....remember product placement?

You would define your boundaries and limitations..........Would you stoop so low as to allow everyone else to take buck shots at you? Would you allow another man to hurt your family? Would you be seen in public in tatters or stark naked? Would you beg or would you rather find work instead? All this is to ensure satisfaction of having "done" the thing in accordance with your conscience about how it should be done. If what you do do not agree with your conscience, then there is no pride in it.

Note that I have not mentioned whether the accomplishment is something good or bad but suffice to agree with your conscience. Some people feel the pride in having taken revenge ...like an eye for an eye. It really depends on the culture and traditions. Sometimes what is venerated before may not be acceptable in the modern days. So you don't go round claiming your pound of flesh to redeem some age old debt!

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 Author| Post time 28-2-2008 01:01 AM | Show all posts
Semantic爓ould燽e燼 problem爓hen爓e're talking爋n爏ubject such as emotion.
Do we use the same word for the same thing? That said, I must clarify on certain thing.

Although I write about the negative side of emotion, there are  really no negative emotion. Different emotion gives different level of energy for outward action. Different level of empowerment or "I can". To simplify discussion, I'll use the word negative only in this context.

So, I'm coming from this angle.

I will write another post on emotion, when I have the time. So all this discussion becomes clearer.


We often fail to see pride as it is can be very subtle. Secretly, subconciously is the keyword here.燱er爉ay爊ot爀ven燽e燼ware爐hat爓e爃ave爄t. Of course there are those clear cases of annoyingly arrogant people. We燼ll燾an爏ee爐hat.營'm爐alking燼bout燼nother爇ind爋f爌ride爓hich爄s爒ery爉asked燼nd爃idden.燱e usually miss it.

The爇ind爐hat燾an爋nly be燿iscovered爄f爓e爏top,燽e still, and燼sk爋urselves爃onest爍uestion爐hat爋nly爓e燾an燼nswer.

Pride is an emotional爏tate爕ou爂et爄nto after you accomplished something. And that is not necessarily bad except most of us get lost there. Probably you know someone who may be in their 40, 50, 60 or 70 who are still proud of winning a爏occer game when they are in their teens. Or maybe they get the best mark for certain subject in school etc... It's爊ot爓rong,爅ust燿on't爂et爏tuck.  It's really a blind spot for most people.
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 Author| Post time 28-2-2008 01:32 AM | Show all posts
Originally posted by hamizao at 26-2-2008 11:44 PM
To me pride builds self esteem/worth. You have to feel good about something you have, done or achieved in order to elevate your acknowledgement or respect for your own self. I am not sure why thi ...


Taking pride in having problems, issues and challenges in life....?

Some people爃ave燽eliefs爏uch燼s爊o爌ain,爊o爂ain.燗s much as most people think that it's true, I must say that this is a clear demonstration of pride.

Life, smooth sailing, everything works like a charm. Then, somebody get restless, there's no kick, no drama, no adventure... so off he go everywhere sabotaging his life. So now, this guy feels that life is really full of meaning...

Messiah complex?營'm爏ure爕ou爇now爏omeone爓ho燾an't爐olerate燼燽land爈ife.燜or爐hem爐here爉ust爑p燼nd燿own.
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 Author| Post time 28-2-2008 01:46 AM | Show all posts
Originally posted by hamizao at 27-2-2008 12:28 AM
Proud to have pride? :re:

I think it is important for the self to feel good about itself. For one, you would be able to "place" yourself....remember product placement?

You would define yo ...


Proud to have pride?

Pride can power up other emotion. We're often proud of our  emotion. Probably we've met someone whose proud of how apathethic they are, how fearful they are, how angry they are... And, how proud they are...

I think it is important for the self to feel good about itself. For one, you would be able to "place" yourself....remember product placement?

It's very important to feel good. The thing is, in pride there is certain 'takut2' in there...You want o preserve the satus quo since you're afraid others might pass you up. So, go higher than pride.

You would define your boundaries and limitations..........Would you stoop so low as to allow everyone else to take buck shots at you? Would you allow another man to hurt your family? Would you be seen in public in tatters or stark naked? Would you beg or would you rather find work instead? All this is to ensure satisfaction of having "done" the thing in accordance with your conscience about how it should be done. If what you do do not agree with your conscience, then there is no pride in it.

It's not about taking abuse. You have a healthy dose of self respect and love for yourself. It's not aboput being pathethic. Well, pride is much higher, stronger than being aphathethic. Pride is the most powerful of what we call negative emotion. That's why people think that it's good. Well, it may be good than other lower emotion, but there are more powerful emotion to experience.  You can go higher than pride.


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 Author| Post time 28-2-2008 01:58 AM | Show all posts
What we're talking about here is not about pride in your country or pride about a job well done as these do not get in the way...

We're talking about the kind of pride that hold you back. That you get stuck on.
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Post time 28-2-2008 05:59 AM | Show all posts

salam,

well..pride that hold you back?

well depends on the kind of situation or life events - again i stressed here, need to be carefully distinguished between those that are not psychologically detrimental / or just mere "trapped in the pastthingy for no reason = solid enough) . My take is = there must be a reason why Special VIctim Unit ( SDU)  as in LAw and Order being established = to cater these needs to ventilate the "trauma" / the shocked / the everythinglah /  among those who are heavily traumatised,like  those victims of the September 11 th NY WTC  .A lot of psychology txbooks had addressed the issue.It's not a made up.
It's not just simply saying to these people - hey you have big chunks of  PRiDE,  you ni trapped in the past lah ..no .. no. So why do they need a psychologist for thsi sort of thing,  if it so darn easy to get on and over with ??????
it pretty easy lah kan if that 's the case. Well tell u what = it's going to form THE SCAR at the back of one's psyche but that's okay . It is the ability of a person to move on, thin ahead and dash through requires certain cognitive restructuring. And many had actually said, the effect had lessen with time. So time does heal the pain .Sabaq jer lah.So the person him/herself ned to be aware of this. knowing when it is pathological and when it is just a pass.

Differentiate this with just ..ordinary life experience let it be in realtionship ker or the likes. The trauma - the form, the intesity of the "threat", impact are not the same.Being very open here. that's why you need to be non - judgemental in this context .

and be clear in the concept of bereavement and also KUBLER ROSS stage of ....

It 's difficult feling to describe as a person who just mere an observer. Tu jer.

negative emotion? depends actually. If u really trapped and paralysed and can't seemed to move on , and learned helplessness still persists and largely predominates your pereceptions etc  , then GET HELP.Fast.


apa beza pride and this so called self - fulfilling prophecy? and associate this with self - insecurity , ni i think would be relevant for us as it will affect the way a manager / a leader / 's  governance of a system. That's why they introducing auditing ....this is a good topic related to PRIDE. Hami ..any take on this??? u ithink is the experienced ones...kinda of interested to know ur views on this.


amboi, see the diveregence of a topic = conection = connection

[ Last edited by  mbhcsf at 28-2-2008 06:57 AM ]
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 Author| Post time 28-2-2008 07:56 PM | Show all posts
Originally posted by mbhcsf at 28-2-2008 05:59 AM
well..pride that hold you back?

It's not just simply saying to these people - hey you have big chunks of  PRiDE,  you ni trapped in the past lah ..no .. no. So why do they need a psychologist for thsi sort of thing,  if it so darn easy to get on and over with ??????



Again, it's not that simple.燳ou燿on't爂o燼round爐elling爌eople爐hat
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Post time 28-2-2008 08:24 PM | Show all posts

alahai....you even mentioned it...lah

u even mentioned that this fella   had underwent several therapy session as in ur post above. then again, u mentioned not until he realized......well I THINK it has something to do with the psychologist becoz it sounded like one. Part of being into counseling or psychotherapy session is to facilitate the this process of finding out the root..or it s not the job of the psychologist to tell u that  i  think the problem is that you have not realized subconsciously  that ...

in fact there are many solution to the problemlah, it is so happened that that this VERY one guy had a pride problem complex well if u are into abnormal psychology reading then you will realised that tey did conduct quite an extensive study on post 9/11 victims to the extext of measuring the degree / severuty of PTSD and teh distance off the poit of impact among various target populations.

so again Agul, that happened to be the best solution for him, i cannot solely based on one success story  but well....i leave like that.

I think for whatevet experience pun youhave it is a learning process and makes you grow. It is meant for u to learn something. It is definitely is. So ..pride or no pride, u figure out. U will only find strength. that's all. Ni pride ker aper lantaklah.
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Post time 28-2-2008 08:26 PM | Show all posts
it is not complicated once you understand the psychopathology. But again kan psychology is pretty interesting.
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Post time 28-2-2008 08:27 PM | Show all posts
Hami , where are you ..u sis?
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 Author| Post time 28-2-2008 08:59 PM | Show all posts
[quote]Originally posted by mbhcsf at 28-2-2008 08:24 PM
u even mentioned that this fella

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