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Originally posted by my-alja at 20-9-2008 12:50 PM 
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org2 cam brian nie senang nak kenal, selalunya org camni risau sgt org pandang rendah kat dia....jadi utk menampakkan diri dia sama level atau lebih drp org lain, dia mulalah memburukkan org lain atau put the pressure on themselves bcos he needs to prove something to others...sindrom " i am good"...the feels do not come from inner self but form outsider....bila org puji dia kaya, bila org puji dia cerdik, bila org puji dia baik, bila org puji dia macam2....org luar yg buat dia rasa diri dia jadi BEST, bukan dr dalam diri sendiri....org2 camni selalunya akan floating carik kawan2 yg boleh memuji kelebihan dia
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How do you find your worth?
From the person you are as a whole, from the things you do, the life you lead, the lives you touch or the way you look?
There is one person I know that spends hours taking photos of herself so that her ego can be stroked by the people that tell her how fabulous she is, and yet, she isn't happy and she goes farther each time trying to win more "friends" and greater "compliments." It's evident why she remains unhappy: the flattery she receives is shallow and has nothing to do with her worth as a person, but only as an object.
Gradually her appearance will diminish in the eyes of the strangers she wants to impress, and what will she do to feed her need then? Her passion in life isn't "her," but she conducts it though it was.
I believe she would know joy if, instead of angling for praise, she earned its worth instead.
Outward beauty, as lovely as it is to behold, is not enough for the person who possess it; she must feel beautiful as well and that encompasses spirit and soul; if people only flatter the former, how can she know the latter?
I believe that self-worth must be found in personal contentment and not in superficial pursuits and when one feels their worth, happiness follows.
[ Last edited by my-alja at 23-9-2008 09:53 AM ] |
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Reply #41 my-alja's post
sebab tu i selalu fikir, anak 2 kena dipahamkan kejayaan dia disekolah bukan utk menunjuk, to get approval from outsiders that they are good....good feeling of being themselves MUST come from within...from inner strength dan sebagai mak/ayah kita kena ada ilmu utk instill the quality in their soul...
Betul betul betul!!!  |
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yeah, i love this topic |
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Reply #39 my-alja's post
cemana nak imbangkan perilaku kesyukuran dgn kita kena berusaha cam nak hidup 1000 thn....paham tak hot...
should i add... nak imbangkan perilaku kesyukuran dan zuhud
Well, pasal zuhud.
Zuhud mungkin kita boleh bahagi kpd kumpulan org. Zuhud para ambia dan sahabat2 Nabi saw tidak sama dgn zuhud utk kita org2 awam. Kalau kita lihat nabi, Baginda memang zuhud yg betul2 zuhud. Tak berharta. habis semua diguna utk agama. Ada sahabat2 baginda juga begitu namun ada juga yg kaya raya.
Jadi, apa yg me faham, zuhud bukanlah meninggalkan dunia, tp menggunakan dunia utk akhirat. Dgn erti kata lain, menggunakan dunia, namun tidak meletakkan hati pada dunia.
Tiadalah perbandingan dunia ini dengan akhirat, kecuali seperti seorang yang memasukkan jarinya dalam lautan besar, maka perhatikan berapa dapatnya. (HR Muslim).
Zuhud dalam Alquran:
"Supaya kamu tidak bersedih karena apa yang lepas dari tanganmu dan tidak bangga dengan apa yang diberikan kepadamu" (QS Al-Hadid: 23).
Ayat ni menjelaskan maksud zuhud yg me beri kat atas. Jika kita punya kelebihan spt kekayaan, jgn bangga tp gunakan utk kebaikan. Jika kita tak berhasil mengejar kekayaan, jgn bersedih hati, tp bersyukur dgn apa yg ada.
Wallahualam.
Dalam hadis Qudsi, diriwayatkan, "Allah berfirman wahai dunia, berkhidmatlah kepada orang yang telah berkhidmat kepada-Ku, dan perbudaklah orang yang mengabdi kepadamu. (HR Al-Qudlai).
See... kita perlukan dunia. Perhambakan dunia tp jgn sampai kita diperhambakan.
Saidina Abu Bakar berkata..
擸a Allah, jadikanlah dunia di tangan kami, bukan di hati kami. |
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Originally posted by HOTlips at 22-9-2008 11:51 AM
should i add... nak imbangkan perilaku kesyukuran dan zuhud
Well, pasal zuhud.
Zuhud mungkin kita boleh bahagi kpd kumpulan org. Zuhud para ambia dan sahabat2 Nabi saw tidak sama dgn ...
ermm.... TQ, i paham...
konfius gak sebenarnya bila org kata; mereka yg taknak usaha utk memperbaiki kehidupan dia sebagai istilah "zuhud"....hidup tak selesa, anak bini tak cukup keperluan hidup esp dizaman moden nie...sebab taknak mewah2kan anak...takut jauh drp tuhan...
so i duk fikir kalo semua org silam pilih nak jadi zuhud camtu, sapa yg nak bela nasib org2 islam yg lain....kalo ekonomi org islam lemah, org kafir senang nak buli kita sebab tu kita kena keje kuat...keje cam nak hidup 1000 thn, dan beribadat cam nak mati esoknya....dlm maksudnya kann ...so bila u kata, tangan keje utk dunia dan hati keje utk akhirat....i setuju
kemewahan , kelebihan yg tuhan beri pd kita hanya pinjaman utk kita salurkan juga utk org lain...bayar zakat umpamanya, kita tak terfikir bagaimana besarnya fungsi zakat nie utk membantu masyarakat seagama... |
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Why Self Worth is Important to Your Child
A child can sometimes have views of himself or herself that are distorted from the truth. Your child may have beliefs which are inaccurate and irrational about their abilities and traits. By focusing on their positive attributes and letting them know you care, you will help to alleviate these feelings. Help your child to plan and set realistic expectations and standards for themselves.
Take some time and talk with your child about their strengths and what they feel they could improve upon. Again, be sure your child is realistic about his or her expectations. The best way you can help them build their self awareness and confidence is helping them work toward accomplishing their goals.
Your child may also benefit from activities which encourage and foster cooperation, teamwork, and accomplishment. By relying on others and having others rely on them, and seeing they are part of something bigger, it will help to boost their feelings of self worth. Through these and other positive, affirming activities, your child is sure to develop a strong sense of self importance, value and worth which will carry into their adult years.
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Finding Self-Worth Outside of Your Wallet
What's the one thing, besides your nutritional needs, that you can't live without? For many people, this might be a difficult question to answer. To others the answer may seem simple. The answer is where your values rest.
Well, people step out on a limb because that's where the fruit is - and I think we can all step out on a limb and say that few people answered that question by saying they absolutely cannot live without one's self. Tricky notion, huh? Call it self-worth, self-esteem or self-validation: confidence and acknowledgment in your own personal value and worth is tough for a lot of people. It's actually tough for a lot of people and due to it; most people seek out materialistic objects to fill the void. Once those voids are filled there's no sign, on the surface of things, of low or no self-worth.
When discussing material objects, for the sake of consistency and simplicity, we can easily reduce most material things to money. Finding value in yourself outside of your finances cannot easily be accomplished without accepting who you are.
Since no one but you truly know what you value in life, the trick here is to first ask yourself a couple of questions:
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[quote]Originally posted by HOTlips at 21-9-2008 12:20 PM
Kenapa kita sering tidak bersyukur?
Ada dua hal yang sering membuat kita tak bersyukur:
1. Kita sering memfokuskan diri pada apa yang kita inginkan, bukan pada apa yang kita miliki.
Sebagai contoh, anda telah memiliki sebuah rumah, kenderaan, pekerjaan tetap, dan pasangan yang terbaik. Tetapi anda masih merasa kurang. Pikiran anda dipenuhi berbagai target dan keinginan. Anda begitu obses utk memiliki rumah yang besar dan indah, kereta mewah, serta pekerjaan yang mendatangkan lebih banyak wang. Kita ingin ini dan itu. Bila tak mendapatkannya kita terus memikirkannya. |
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Reply #48 my-alja's post
kekadang i tanya gak dgn hubby, kita nie tak bersyurkur ke? .....
Mungkin!  wakakaka....
Sendiri mau ingatlah. Itu soal hati. 
Pd me pulak, yg tak bersyukur tu bila berlaku keadaan mengeluh atau mengomen.
errr... faham tak ni? |
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Originally posted by my-alja at 22-9-2008 08:21 AM
There is one person I know that spends hours taking photos of herself so that her ego can be stroked by the people that tell her how fabulous she is, and yet, she isn't happy and she goes farther each time trying to win more "friends" and greater "compliments." It's evident why she remains unhappy: the flattery she receives is shallow and has nothing to do with her worth as a person, but only as an object.
...
i kena monitor my doter....heheheh
dia nak sgt org kata dia cantik, kalo tak dia sanggup gaduh2...esp dgn abg yg semulajadi tak suka dikatakan ensem ...
2 anak yg ada kelebihan dan kekukarangan tersendiri....so sebagai mak/ayah, kita kena alert dgn kurangan dan kelebihan mereka....top up mana yg perlu supaya dia membesar secara seimbang...bukan setakat otak saja geliga, tapi blum lulus jadi manusia |
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Originally posted by HOTlips at 24-9-2008 08:40 AM
Mungkin! wakakaka....
Sendiri mau ingatlah. Itu soal hati.
Pd me pulak, yg tak bersyukur tu bila berlaku keadaan mengeluh atau mengomen.
errr... faham tak ni?
my fren jawab plak...itu dah nature pompuan ...wakakakaka
ntah laa hot, kekadang bila kita cakap kita puas dgn kehidupan kita....ada org kata kita riak, kita dapat suami baik....ada org tunggu dia jadi tak baik....hahahah
kekadang bukan taknak citer yg manis2 tapi kena carik crowd yg sesuai kot....kawan yg boleh terima, lebih dan kurangnya kita....esp dlm forum camni, macam2 org boleh pikir pasal kita...
i need something to make my brain working...apa sajalah, hubby give me assignment, i akan buat sampai dpt result....then dia decide, to go or not to go....i hate routine in my life ...i fikir,kalo i suka mylife static at certain point...maybe i stop mencari lah kot...i takut nak sampai kat point statik tu....bosan ya amat hidup i nanti.....
btw, apa cara nak tunjuk kesyukuran kita pd Allah.....perlu tak kita luaskan sesama manusia? |
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i kena monitor my doter....heheheh
dia nak sgt org kata dia cantik, kalo tak dia sanggup gaduh2..
rasanya ini nature bg budak2 pompuan. My girl pun sama.
Btw, soal komplen ni bukan pompuan jek tau! Ramai laki yg peel mcm ni. Komplen bini tak pandai masak, bini gemuk, bini dah tak lawa. Mula lah nak cari lain.
Talking about cari lain, ada sorg ustaz ni, consultant dlm kesihatan lebih kurang.
Dia kata...
Lelaki selalu sgt nak cari lain bila isteri dah tak best. Isteri sorang pun tak hantar servis, ada hati nak cari lain. Patutnya, kalau bini tu dah gemuk, kasi hantar masuk slimming class. Tak pun beli kan alat2 exercise ke apa2 yg patut. Kalau bini sakit, lenguh2, urut2 bini tu. Kalau bini tak pandai bergaya, ajarkan cara yg sepatutnya ikut selera suami, etc.
Lelaki lagi tak bersyukur sebenarnya.
Meh nak kasi tip yg ustaz ni bg:
Utk menegangkan payu dara:
Mlm2, letak air satu baldi. Biarkan terdedah. Bangun subuh nanti, ambik towel, basahkan guna air tu, pastu kasi tolak itu asset ke atas.
err.... self-esteem utk ibu2. |
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Reply #52 HOTlips's post
hehehehe....payu dara ngacam, menaikkan self-esteem ...btul gak tu jgn sampai letak self-worth kat situ dah laa ...
inborn quality manusia nie berbeza ikut individu, sesapa rajin boleh baca buku the people code, by dr hertman.....jadi kesimpulan yg i dapat drp baca buku nie, semua karektor..red, blue, white and yellow: ada kekurangan dan kelebihan memasing...selagi kita tak kenal kelebihan dan kekurangan nie...sampai bila2 kita tak belajar nak kenal diri sendiri
dr situ baru kita top-up mana yg perlu....dan semua karektor terdedah pada isu self-worth nie cuma kalo red karektor nampak terlalu ketara kalo dia tersalah letak self-worth tersebut... |
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aiikk...2 org jer ke..??
otak dan hati dah takder perasaan skg ni...so takat baca dan senyum sket2 jerk.. |
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Reply #53 my-alja's post
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rajin ko membaca ye makcik... aku pon rajin baca gak..tp baca tajuk je lah |
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Reply #51 my-alja's post
u cant stand it when life reaches the static point ye?
ko kira ok lagi..
aku kalau hidup ala2 20% static je aku dah rasa macam nak muntah...mmg not a wonder sebab aku ADHD (diagnose sendiri lepas bawak anak jumpa doctor..mak anak sama hyper!).. mujur la aku dah jumpa satu keje yg tak memobsankan otak aku and allows me to have my own rest time, get to meet different people at different places everyday.. |
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Reply #52 HOTlips's post
hottie,
ade kawan aku nye mak ni cakap kat aku..kalau mau itu payudare teganggg sekali sekala blend/lenyek labu kuning ni.. pastu tepek2 kan situ... kasik keringgggg then mandi sambil tolak2 ke atas
heheh aku blom pernah buat lagi so tatau berkesan ke tak |
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Originally posted by Delifrance at 26-9-2008 07:10 AM
u cant stand it when life reaches the static point ye?
ko kira ok lagi..
aku kalau hidup ala2 20% static je aku dah rasa macam nak muntah...mmg not a wonder sebab aku ADHD (diagnose sendiri l ...
gud for you thou...susah nak buat benda yg kita suka dgn keterbatasan yg ada
kekadang bila org buat sebab dia "rasa" dia suka sebab ＃＃ |
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Author
Post time 22-9-2008 09:58 AM
.....buat apa lagi, selain mambasuh, mengiron, memasak, mendriver
