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JOHNNY KANGKUNG SHOULD BE PM

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Post time 16-5-2008 01:47 AM | Show all posts |Read mode
Right now is the time for Johnny Kangkung to be PM. The nation needs kangkung for it children to grow strong and healthy. Dugro or any other milk like in those ads you see on tv where the kids grow suddenly twice their sizes are a bunch of lies. Johnny Kangkung will make new laws in Malaysia where Mawi must sing the national anthem "Negaraku" in each and every one of his concerts. The nation has already realised that Mawi has not yet married. This will cause a problem amongst teens who secretly wish to marry Mawi, for they are given pretty high hopes. Johnny Kangkung has already predicted that Mawi will not marry in April 2008.
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 Author| Post time 16-5-2008 01:55 AM | Show all posts

Why are there no more "twister" in KFC?

Johnny Kangkung has written in his book "the dilemma of the new found sewers" that rats love to eat cheese. Know this is quite known to have become a reality since Johnny Kangkung is good at predicting 4D Magnum results, although some people testify to the contrary. The real question that bothers our nation today is:

Why are there no more "twister" in KFC?

I think many Malaysians remember the time when KFC unleashed its "Twister' meal where chicken fillets are wrapped in tortilla. It is believed by some fishermen in Kampung Ulu Rimba in Pulau Bertasik that such chicken fillets cause fishes to become more aggressive and therefore the nation gets more healthy fishes to eat. The reason behind this belief should not affect the government's decision to let the albums of Terengganu hard rock band Mullet to be banned from all traveller's hostels.

Johnny Kangkung promises to lift this ban and the decision will indirectly increase the level of Viagras consumed by women in the age range of 34-56.
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 Author| Post time 16-5-2008 02:02 AM | Show all posts

For further reference

All the books that Johnny Kangkung wrote:

1. The female is a she-male
2. Candy for your radio is bad for the live acts
3. Why must we find treasures in the living hall
4. the dilemma of the new found sewers
5. Whoever reads my books are idiots
6. Is it right for money to be used as love handles
7. I've been on the telescope of narnia
8. Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun
9. Yay! I won a free BIG MAC!
10. My Big Mac was stolen by Aliens
11. Who is this Joshua Kong fella and why is he writing me love letters?
12. Thus Spake Zarathustra Edisi Siasat
13. Hak Anda
14. How I met your mother
15. My name is Earl
16. List of words that I never used before...
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 Author| Post time 16-5-2008 02:12 AM | Show all posts

The implication of the scandal

JK's digest editon no.1287

I wish to clear up certain facts that I have been wrongfully accused of these past months. These accusations were none but the smear campaigns of by high school debate opponent, Joshua Kong.

I did not try to solicit sex from a prostitute in Hotel How Chai. Even though I said a few words asking for such service, I was merely trying to figure out the psyche of the prostitute and how to stop such prostitution in our glorious country once I become PM (After I defeat that Joshua Kong!).

And even though I gave her RM 100 (manyak cantik, mahal lo!), that money was just a decoy so that the prostitute would not realise that I was undercover.

And even though I brought her up to my room, I did not try to do anything with the woman.

So the pictures that Joshua Kong released which showed me opening my pants and holding a packet of condom was just a misunderstanding.
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 Author| Post time 16-5-2008 02:23 AM | Show all posts

Johnny Kangkung has invented a time machine

JK's digest (the good JK), 30 February 1978, Blue (12/24/767) Green (12/354//7)

Johnny Kangkung has invented a time machine where you can cook your clothes and eat them after the process. It is made so that Johnny Kangkung can become PM of this nation without any monkeys trying to steal his big BMW sports car. It looks like a frying pan, and it works exactly like a frying pan, but you put your clothes in it. After that, you try to add a little salt to your clothes so that the flavour will be just right. After your clothes turn golden brown, sprinkle some fresh grounded pepper to your liking. Chew properly. It's amazing isn't it? People eating their clothes? That has got to be in the future my friends!



CAN JOSHUA KONG INVENT SUCH A MACHINE? NO!!! JOSHUA KONG IS NOT FIT TO BE PM!!!
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 Author| Post time 16-5-2008 02:28 AM | Show all posts

The time has come...



JOHNNY KANGKUNG.... IS COMING.... TO A CINEMA....















NEAR YOU!!!
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Post time 17-5-2008 02:11 AM | Show all posts
the latest is John Kentang
Johnny Kangkung is outdated

John Kentang is coming to.../ quote]Originally posted by jaundice at 16-5-2008 02:28


JOHNNY KANGKUNG.... IS COMING.... TO A CINEMA....















NEAR YOU!!! [/quote]
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 Author| Post time 17-5-2008 04:22 PM | Show all posts

Reply #7 bizsari's post

Cannot, only Johnny Kangkung can be PM... to defeat THE EVIL "JOSHUA KONG...."


Johnny Kangkung has a time machine, and can predict Magnum 4D results..... (refer to posts 2 and 5)

RIGHT NOW, ONLY HE CAN DEFEAT THE EVIL JOSHUA KONG!
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Post time 17-5-2008 11:43 PM | Show all posts

Jaundice the good adviser of the wrong one

keep on eating kangkung until it is yellow..



then gold or emas will return to M'sia to keep the bananas... a live again
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Post time 29-5-2008 08:43 AM | Show all posts
very good johnny kangkung....yes...i vote johnny kangkung for PM, not Joshua Kong sakit jiwa....bcoz i see clearly, johnny kangkung is very much better n capable candidate for PM, compared to joshua kong the lousy coockoo daydreamer.....
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Post time 29-5-2008 08:49 AM | Show all posts
I love kangkung!!
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Post time 29-5-2008 08:52 AM | Show all posts
furthermore johnny kangkung is an inventor, he'd invented a good thing for malaysian to eat kangkung and cloth everyday, that will end the food shortage problem faced by the whole world now, this is really a breakthru revolutionary new finding for the whole world....the world should elect johnny kangkung, PM of malaizie for President of the world.... banned joshua kong to pulau tiga in sabah...let him join the survivors from the 1st survivors tv series to start a new cabinet for the fish and birds there.....so that his power crazed chronic disease could be cured after talking to the fish and birds of his kingdom...
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Post time 29-5-2008 08:55 AM | Show all posts

Reply #11 alphawolf's post

yes alpha...vote kangkung for PM...say no to kong....let the throne of king kong stay in hollywood
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Post time 30-5-2008 01:44 PM | Show all posts

Kangkong actual said farewell to me

the few days before I was released from PPSR - detention without trial in 1973/74, my kangkong in the detention centre planted and nurtured by me  just turned yellow.


so Joshua KONG  is to be PM soon... as forummers bring up this reminder.
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Post time 12-6-2008 08:24 AM | Show all posts
johnny kangkong for PM. say no to joshua kong, an old man with a dream to eat his yellow kangkong in his detention centre 35 years ago unfulfilled till he dreams of saying farewell to kangkong till today....
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Post time 14-6-2008 09:17 PM | Show all posts

nature is faithful

God is faithful and even vegetables can convey a message of joy in golden colour....


farewell is golden then...
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Post time 4-7-2008 08:47 PM | Show all posts

gold coming aback to Sabah

It must be through the effort of Joshua Kong with 24 Police Reports worth more than RM7.441 trillions...

and the exposure on Petronas in extravanganza.. like their own pockets..
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Post time 5-7-2008 11:21 AM | Show all posts

this is what I wrote before

Sent: Monday, 13 November, 2006 6:39 PM


Subject: JK's Digest no 19 of November, 06 [304 of 2006] The hardy vegetable reminds me to share this.



JK's Digest no 19 of November, 06 [304 of 2006] The hardy vegetable reminds me to share this.


VEGETABLE kangkong fit for the KING.




This is a testimony of something that happened 32 years ago.
I was in solitary confinement for a role as whistle blower which hurt some mad people.
That was 11 months without trial and justice denied.
My effort could not solve Sabah woes then and now it is so BIG with the IC and poverty Crisis.
Again in those dark days, nobody really dare to challenge the mad leaders. That is one of the reasons why we are so poor exacerbated by the double 6, tragedy in 1976.
So what were the signs then?
I was the one to start a 'prosperous vegetable garden' from scratch inside the detention camp or University Kepayan. My clients were those prison officials. I had a few hundred Ringgit from the sale of vegetables from hard labour but blessed by God. I think the Officer In Charge is still living.
One of the hardy vegetable was KangKong. I could grow them and harvest them by the row every week. Then suddenly all the vegetables just turned yellow and wilted. So that was the sign that I was to be released soon which was indeed true. Even a primary 3 educated prison warder was telling of that as a sign of my imminient release.
So God would use any small and big things to show us his divine way for us. But can anyone recognise that? Even mosquitos can be used as alarm clock to wake us up to keep an appointment.
I believe mosquitos as blood suckers can minimise heart attacks. I had been bitten by hundreds or even thousands of mosquitos while in detention camp but nothing disease happened to me.
This sharing of testimony comes about because I have just eaten some Kangkong this evening.
Praise God for this sharing.
Joshua Kong (proponent of MIGS)
Author of New Wealth Order, EPIC of Sabah, FIRE, Sabah Wealth - image of woods power,
EPIC of Sabah - 2nd Edition, Paper to Parliament Select Committee on Unity and National Service.
EPIC of Sabah - 3rd Ed., WATER, A tussle in 0biodiversity of two liquids - palm oil and water,
Sabah and Sarawak in Malaysia in 1963, Paper Paper to Parliamentary Select Committee on Integrity (2006).
http://www.e-borneo.com/col/jkong/
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